How do we know that insects are so clever?
Because they always know when you're eating outside!

What is green and brown, has four legs and can kill you if it falls out of a tree and lands on you?
A pool table!

What lives in gum trees?
Stick insects!

What happened to the man who turned into an insect?
He just beetled off!

What is the insect's favourite game?
Cricket!

What's an insect's best chat up line?
Excuse me, but is this stool taken!

What has four wheels and flies?
A rubbish bin!

Where would you put an injured insect?
In an antbulance!

What do you get if you cross the Lone Ranger with an insect?
The Masked-quito!

What has antlers and sucks blood?
A moose-quito!

Why did the mosquito go to the dentist?
To improve his bite!

What is a mosquito's favourite sport?
Skin-diving!

How do you know if you have a tough mosquito?
You slap him and he slaps you back!

What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly?
Try sewing buttons on a mosquito!

What's the difference between a lawyer and a mosquito?
A mosquito drops off you when you die!

What is the most religious insect?
A mosque-ito!

What has 6 legs, bits and talks in code?
A morse-quito!

Why are mosquitoes religious?
They prey on you!